June 29, 2008

The roller-coaster ride continues. Dad was admitted to the hospital yesterday. This time it is not his heart. After meeting with the lung specialist and Dad's on-call doctor, it is determined that another specialist, another CT scan, and a few other tests are needed on top of the CT scan that has already been done and the multiple upon multiple blood draws. This doctor seems determined to get to the bottom of the issue, but has named a few scary things (such as pulmonary embolism) as possible scenarios. I am beyond guessing at this point. It just doesn't pay. I just wonder how many things can continue to be wrong with him. This is admission #4 for this year.

I received confirmation that Gerald will be here the 18th. I have lots to do in between then and now, and really don't see how it will all happen. It doesn't matter, I have to try. There are a few things that must happen. Clean the carport (about a two hour job), rearrange the den (about two to three hours), and then do molding work in the den and in the hallway. I then have to patch the hole in the wall in the bathroom closet from repairing the plumbing. Then, I need to build the half wall in the kitchen on the backside of the bar. Then, depending on how much time is left (HA!!) I will regroup and see what is left to be done.

I have called Greg like four or five times to update him on what is wrong with Dad. He doesn't answer his phone. When I call Lora's phone it goes straight to voicemail. I find it ridiculous that he knows Dad is in the hospital, has not called for an update, and then, when I have something to tell him he isn't where I can talk to him. He hasn't bothered to call me back. Honestly, I don't know that I want to talk to him. I feel like I am the older sister and he is the baby.

I promised a list for changing my life. Well, I have to say that Dad preempted that with this unexpected trip to the hospital. I will get back to that. I am determined to do some things that I feel are beneficial for me and what I believe my life is supposed to be. I would have to say that knowing that I am over Bill was a big step in that direction. It doesn't hurt as much to think about what he promised, what he did, and where he is now. I know that it was never meant to be. I am grateful that maybe I was able to keep him from hurting someone else and her children. That means a lot. I believe that I will never date again, but that in and of itself does not mean that life is over. There is a lot that I can accomplish without a man in my life. I am sort of anxious to see what that will entail.

More tomorrow.